goshdarnspam | IT'S TIME FOR THE...

Huh?

[ The way he phrases that bothers her, leaving her to weigh if it's just her imagination or if there was something off with Archer. Concluding it had to be his fault (because nothing is ever wrong when it comes to her perfection), she shakes her head. ]

And the chances you did have, you fouled up on. Don't think I'm going to forgive you just because we had a touching moment.

[ Even if she forgave him at the time. She's taking it back because a) he's a butt and b) he's here right now so it invalidates that whole scene!!

Also c) because she's difficult. ]

--a touching moment?

[ It's not like he has any problem believing that he had a bunch of chances he wasn't aware of and fouled up on them. Screwing up is just what he does, after all, even if he doesn't like to admit it in front of Rin. But what's this about a touching moment? That wouldn't have happened. He's sure of it.

--he has a bad feeling. ]

Rin. What's the last date you remember it being?

[ Leer. ] I'm not telling you that!

Geez, I know you have a poor memory, what with you being unable to remember your identity or anything useful related to yourself as a Servant... [ Yeah, the guy who projects weapons identically just from memory sucks at it. ] Are you going to tell me something ridiculous like I'm involved in some sort of time skip?

[ Rin's not sure if she wants to be involved in the future. ~~Her future self might be madly in love with Shirou or something lame.~~ ]

[ ~~But let's be honest, wacky fanservice sequel issues aside, Rin is definitely not the one with the worst deal when it comes to future selves.~~

He sighs. ]

I hate to disappoint again, since it's already bad enough I'm not Saber. But I'm going to tell you that before I came here I'd only been your Servant for two days.

[ Funny how it feels like it couldn't have been that short a time. Rin just leaves that much of an impression. ]

Hm... this must be a side-effect of Second Magic. I don't like dealing with this kind of situation.

[ Ufufu. ] Oh but I have this new found power of you. Your future lies within my mind. I could spoil it all for you or just keep it to myself.

[ She seems to be enjoying this way more than she should. Archer, think about your life choices. ]

Well, it is more your sort of situation than mine. I can't help, unless you need a parallel world where breakfast is different.

[ Oh, he thinks about his life choices all the time. But the outcome is never good. Ever. ]

...you're mistaken, Rin.

Mistaken? I doubt it. [ A scoff. ] When am I ever wrong?

[ If he values his life and his eardrums, he won't answer a loaded question like that. ]

[ He values his eardrums, at least. And "stomped to death by Rin Tohsaka" was not how he was planning to go. So he politely lets that question pass. ]

If you spoil my future for me, won't I change it just to prove a point to you? Honestly...I think that would be embarrassing for both of us, so you shouldn't do it.

Oh ho ho, are you are saying you're capable of changing yourself? I didn't think that sort of thing was possible...

[ Another stab at his personality. She's quite vicious today. ]

How good are you with sewing?

[ He walked right into that one. ]

I didn't say I'd change it much. You know it would only be enough to make things more difficult for you?

--sewing?

[ Of course. He only would change to make things problematic. That's just like him. ]

Yes, sewing. I'll need an outfit if I'm going to be a super hero.

...

[ !!! ]

[ !!!!!! ]

I refuse.

You'd be an embarrassment.

[ Wow rude tbh. ]

An embarrassment?! You're just upset I'd make a better hero than you! [ Screeching. ] While you were off being useless, I was saving lives!

[ Although it's debatable whether or not Shinji counts as a life. ~~And no it doesn't count that Archer helped her with it since he fails to remember!~~ ]

Coming up with strategies to defeat the greatest opponent of the war! [ By having sex. ]

Destroying abominations with just a mere Command Mantra! [ Excalibur is one hell of a powerful Noble Phantasm. ]

Yes, I was the true hero of the Holy Grail War whether you want to admit it!

Well, I'm not disputing that.

[ He believes her, by the way. It seems perfectly natural to him that the Grail War worked out with her as the true hero! He can already tell she's that sort of person. Although he hopes she didn't get her heart broken too badly by some of the things necessary--maybe he was able to protect her well enough? Maybe his plan succeeded and she and Saber got properly hooked up like they should always have been?

That might be too much to hope for. ]

But that means you've had enough, right? Quit while you're ahead, and don't mess it up here.

[ Oh just how wrong he is!! E-Rank luck, etc. ]

If I did that though... um what else would I spend my time here doing?

[ Seriously Archer. ] Unless you're giving me permission to be slouch off in my studies? My, that doesn't sound like you in the slightest.

[ Hey, don't take away his hope! His hope for something really stupid and broken. ]

Surely studying this world's magic would be more useful to you than going out and trying to be a hero.

If you think about it, Rin, putting on a costume like that and waltzing around saving people in it, that's what would be slouching off.

How do you know it's not something I'd be really good at? I could put on an attractive outfit and prance around saving everyone!

[ Huff. ]

Besides, it's not as though I would look ridiculous in any costume. [ Let's just ignore this canon example. ] You just don't want to help your Master.

Yes, I see now. You're just trying to slouch off yourself.

...I suppose I'm flattered.

[ A beat. ]

Minutes ago you said you didn't trust me. Now, you'd let me make the outfit you plan to wear while saving people. In public.

[ ... ] I'd try it on before actually going out in public with it!

[ She's not that stupid, Archer. ] Besides, how would you design it?

[ In before pants. ]

[ He folds his arms. ]

Pants.

[ In after pants. ]

Pants?

[ r u kiddin ]

Why would you deny the world my beautiful legs? What would make a person happier than seeing my perfect body after they've been rescued?!

Not worrying that you'll kill them for seeing up your skirt. Heroics require a lot of athleticism.

[ Also maybe he doesn't like the idea of people seeing up Rin's skirt? A little? Only a little. ]

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done.

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