i was bored

[psychomancy]

● leave a comment with a funny text
● use this site for inspiration as needed
● text back to other people
● ???
● profit
● wake up the next morning and regret it all
● stolen from everywhere
● NOBODY IS EVER LATE

Comments

[klutziness]

The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.

[rocksforbrains]

babe i love you but i dunno if you get to make fashion calls like that

[futurebatwoman]

rikku are you sure

[rocksforbrains]

HAS ANYONE SEEN MY LEGS

or my torso

or my left arm

[bullseye]

r u typin this w ur tongue

[futurebatwoman]

As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.

[solar_absorber]

And I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: you better share those taquitos.

[threadbare]

I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.

[psychomancy]

I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him

[ecphrasis]

Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.

[bullseye]

n then i hshot it n her faace lol

[ex_engineers208]

so spent 3 hours trying to make the window bl inds go down how to use the string things a gain

[bullseye]

weird the same thin happnd 2 me once

[symmachy]

it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined

[solar_absorber]

I know what you're thinking. Yes your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.

[notadartboard]

i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero

[hackeralastair]

My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."

[hackeralastair]

Also I have to share this from Texts From the Shadow Realm. WE LOVE AND MISS YOU BRUNO:

[bringerofwar]

I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants. Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.

[maskurbates]

Daddy's busy right now, baby, can it wait?

[notyourchauffeur]

I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake

[spacetimeprime]

You won't.

[boozebot]

I'm holding a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.

[redrevving]

im gonna have a badass scar
o wait no im not.

[backatthehotel]

a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds

[spacetimeprime]

This show she took me to had so many little girls in skirts, it reminds me of Kiss Players.

[notyourchauffeur]

Are you one of those types of older bots, Vector?